Will orate for cash

'Great is our admiration of the orator who speaks with fluency and discretion'

-Cicero

I'm not sure that my fluency is up to the standards of a Classical Roman Orator and I know for a fact that I'm have far to much of a loud mouth to be considered discrete. And so with a little trepidation I have started offering my services as a 'speaker'. My family will happily reassure you that for me speaking will provide no challenge at all. Shutting up on the other hand....

As part of my Fundraising for the Expedition I have taken to letter writing, sending out a description of myself, the society and our expedition along with a request for donations to any local charitable groups, Round tables, Rotary clubs, Organisations and people on the street as I can find addresses for. In Return for any potential donations I am offering myself as a provider of post consumptorary oration and light entertainment, i.e. an after dinner speech and maybe a juggling act or magic show.

Batch no.1 hot off the press and ready for shipping out.

I am also organising  to provide talks to a few schools and Youth Groups about the Expeditions British exploring offer and benefits, costs and funding options, in order to further the cause of the society and hopefully recruit a new generation of keen young explorers to take off on adventures around the world.

So with these in mind I have to start planning speeches, rehearsing charming and hilarious anecdotes and preparing for potential hecklers. Luckily for the school talks I can rely on the thrilling prospect of adventure and a certain degree of authority based largely on the size differential between me and the children I am talking to, to keep my audience silent and attentive.  Talking to large groups of adults who are not legally obliged to remain in the building with me until at least the home time bell, is  another kettle of fish.

Pitching to crowds which could potentially be so varied really is leaving me with a knotted feeling in the pit of my stomach. As already mentioned most people who have met me will attest to the fact that I will win gold the day verbal diarrhea makes it into the Olympics  Despite this, and the fact that I seem to receive relatively good reactions to a greater proportion of the sentences which spew fourth; I have, to date, employed a conversational technique inspired by the US military, i.e. put enough conversational rounds in the air and eventually some will land where you want.

After dinner speaking is going to call for some sharpshooting rather than Full auto spraying and for this I will have to resort to practice. Well planned speeches, rehearsal in front of the mirror and a pocket full of flash cards just in case will all be called into action. But developing these skills can only serve to benefit me in later life, and so begins the first of many Areas of personal development which this trainee leader scheme is going to assist me with.

You never know, by the end of the process I may be able make a blog post that takes less that half an hour to read. I might even start reining in sentences under 100 words . And one day, if I work hard I may be able to accurately express myself in 140 characters or less ( I mean come on twitter can't I go a little over Even my dissertation allows 10% either way on the word count. My messages to Stephen Fry are so groundbreaking they need to go over that limit I'm sorry).

But as Shakespeare said through the lips of Polonius (or the actor playing him):

 'Brevity is the Sole of wit'